Another Week Beyond – 1923

Dear Friends

Sometimes, those who tell us that they are coming for a meeting or an event do not show up. As a result, we tend to get a little disappointed and even blame them for not honouring their word.  However, it would be apt to ask ourselves, “How have we contributed to this very situation that we are complaining about?” “Did we actually give people the space to honestly decline our invitation without feeling that we would think less of them or imagining that they would be penalised in some way?”

The “conversation of dissent” is one of 6 conversations in a framework by Peter Block that informs our practice. It is based on the premise that refusal is the foundation of commitment and one’s “yes” has no meaning if one could not say “no,” in the first place. As such if we want to build sustainable communities, we must encourage dissent and listen to it gracefully and sincerely with a view of strengthening mutual trust and respect. We must be mindful that such authentic conversations are the measure of good work and when people can honestly tell us why they do not want to come to an event, we are making progress.

Last Friday, we had the pleasure of hosting 16 visitors from the Executive Leadership and Organisational Change Programme of the North Kentucky University. After, getting an overview of what we do and why it is important, they returned the favour by facilitating the practice of 6 conversations for our staff and interns. These conversations were at times awkward because they are not commonplace in our daily lives, but the experience was meaningful as we conversed with each other in a way we normally would not.

A meaningful conversation uplifts us and enhances our well-being. A father of 3 children who is visually impaired was all smiles after hosting some of the visitors at his home. He took much pride sharing about the sporting achievements of his children, his hobbies and his voluntary work in his neighbourhood. He elaborated on the neighbourhood savings scheme that his children were a part of and a boat trip his family will be making to visit his wife’s family who live in a village off Batam during the Hari Raya holiday.

Whenever we visit someone, it is only good manners that we bring a gift, and a conversation that enables people to share and learn about each other’s’ abilities, achievements, aspirations and activities would be a satisfying exchange of gifts. The experience that we co-create when we are with each other is the gift we give and receive.

Enjoy your weekend.
Gerard

All we have to do to create the future is to change the nature of our conversations, to go from blame to ownership, and from bargaining to commitment, and from problem solving to possibility. – Peter Block

PAST AWB POSTS

2443 – Why Do You Work?

I was visiting Meelah, a resident who has led food drives and many social activities to enhance the wellbeing of her neighbours.   I listened intently, as she expressed her concern for families that would require assistance. I was   touched that she continued to keep track of so many lives in spite of her own declining health. She donned on the new spectacles she had recently afforded and checked her reflection using her phone before looking at me expectantly for a response. “How? I look like a teacher or not?” She exclaimed while tucking some strands of hair behind her ears.

Read More »

2442 – It Starts with “Hello”

Every morning, like clockwork, four-year-old Lisa (not her real name) stops by her neighbour’s flat on her way to preschool. She stands at the gate, waiting patiently to say “Hello” to the elderly man who lived there. Known for his stern demeanour and habit of scolding noisy children, this Uncle wasn’t someone most would approach. At first, he ignored her. Undeterred, she stands there, day after day, offering her simple greeting. Then one day, something changed. The Uncle returned her greeting. Soon after, they began sharing quiet moments – sitting together, eating biscuits, and watching TV —always under the watchful

Read More »

2441 – Looking for Treasure not Dirt

As a community worker, I knock on doors to introduce myself and to explore how residents may contribute toward the wellbeing of their neighbourhood.  By chatting with them, I discover their talents, aspirations and values. Of course, not everyone talks to me when I knock but it is always so rewarding when they do. Last week, I met 98-year-old Madam Wong and her son who is in his 70s. I learnt that Madam Wong shares her art and craft skills with the older residents in her community.  What she enjoys doing most and is really good at is “weaving” together

Read More »

2440 – Leading the Charge for Change

For years, the residents of a public rental block in Yishun struggled with unsanitary rubbish disposal, bird-feeding, and littering from open windows. As tensions mounted, frustration could have easily divided the community. But instead, a group of proactive volunteers decided to address the issue themselves, determined to improve their living environment—not just for themselves, but for everyone in the neighbourhood. These volunteers initiated a series of conversations with their neighbours where residents openly expressed their frustrations and shared personal stories. “It doesn’t feel good to come home from work after a long day to a living environment that is unhygienic,”

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2439 – The Strength of Community

“One of the marvelous things about community is that it enables us to welcome and help people in a way we couldn’t as individuals.” – Jean Vanier Our work is grounded in an approach known as Asset-Based Community Development (ABCD). ABCD is a relationship-driven, strengths-based approach that focuses on identifying and mobilizing often overlooked community assets for sustainable development. During this year’s Youth Appreciation Day, we experienced firsthand the power of Gifts, Relationships, and Care (GRC), core principles of ABCD. GRC reminds us that everyone holds unique gifts — skills, strengths, and lived experiences. When shared within the framework of

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2438 – A Game Changer

A Game Changer Submitted by: Adrian, Community Worker During a community gathering in April, along with the spread of food on the table, a robust serving of soccer talk was served up. This is a topic that energized the youth who were present. Their excitement wasn’t just about the game; they were eager to form a proper soccer team. So enthusiastic were they, that that very evening, the Bukit Ho Swee Soccer programme was born. Our first training session took place at an outdoor court that was well-maintained and ideal for practice, but it was too far away. The commute

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2437 – A House is not a Home

By Pei Ling, Community Worker What is a home to you? Is it just a place filled with your stuff? Where you store your sofa, TV, bed, clothes?   These are questions we ask ourselves as we walk along the corridors of the small flats in the neighbourhoods we serve. We catch glimpses of everyday life along these corridors – mismatched footwear, potted plants, toys scattered about, and front doors of various colours – some freshly painted, some faded. Inside, some of these flats have varying degrees of stuff, but they most certainly hold more than that. For each is Home

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2436 – Small Fortune, Big Friends

By Jie Min & Marlina, Community Workers We were in conversation with 9 mothers who dreamed of having their own home-based business to alleviate their financial challenges. 3 of them had already started baking, cooking and catering from home for small events while the rest were just very interested in exploring how they could get started. Hence, we thought that inviting them to manage a booth at Parking Day, an upcoming community event on Saturday, 14 September 2024, would be a good hands-on learning experience especially for those who have never hawked their wares.  There was much excitement and enthusiasm

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PAST AWB POSTS

2443 – Why Do You Work?

I was visiting Meelah, a resident who has led food drives and many social activities to enhance the wellbeing of her neighbours.   I listened intently, as she expressed her concern for families that would require assistance. I was   touched that she continued to keep track of so many lives in spite of her own declining health. She donned on the new spectacles she had recently afforded and checked her reflection using her phone before looking at me expectantly for a response. “How? I look like a teacher or not?” She exclaimed while tucking some strands of hair behind her ears.

Read more >

2442 – It Starts with “Hello”

Every morning, like clockwork, four-year-old Lisa (not her real name) stops by her neighbour’s flat on her way to preschool. She stands at the gate, waiting patiently to say “Hello” to the elderly man who lived there. Known for his stern demeanour and habit of scolding noisy children, this Uncle wasn’t someone most would approach. At first, he ignored her. Undeterred, she stands there, day after day, offering her simple greeting. Then one day, something changed. The Uncle returned her greeting. Soon after, they began sharing quiet moments – sitting together, eating biscuits, and watching TV —always under the watchful

Read more >

2441 – Looking for Treasure not Dirt

As a community worker, I knock on doors to introduce myself and to explore how residents may contribute toward the wellbeing of their neighbourhood.  By chatting with them, I discover their talents, aspirations and values. Of course, not everyone talks to me when I knock but it is always so rewarding when they do. Last week, I met 98-year-old Madam Wong and her son who is in his 70s. I learnt that Madam Wong shares her art and craft skills with the older residents in her community.  What she enjoys doing most and is really good at is “weaving” together

Read more >